feeling sad?
yes I'm like a pedaso de papel arrugado this days

i remember all those boys that use to go to rehab and
will twist themselves in the bed trying hard to fight,
wile the drugs are doing their job making you feel
like you need more right there where you just roll in
the bed cry for help but don't wanna see anyone,
scream but want to be calm,
twist and roll and really you just wanna sleep and
be out of all this fucking dependency.
i put myself in this situation where i really need to commute to go to a warm place, and is far for me, feels like a have to walk miles to get there, but is what i think the right think to do right now and it is kind of keeping me awake and alive.
i notice also that i don't like leaving alone, i actually hate to leave alone, giving away my community leaving really mess up something inside me, having no one to talk or at lease to hear breathing around when you get back home really sucks. My cat doesn't do it she is beautiful and loves me but she unfortunately can't enjoy my food.
yes i feel sad depress triste llorona gorda irresponsable mentirosa y culpable

i guess if i go back on this blog i can see that is just one more of those up and downs.